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With: Debbie Gibson, Tiffany, A Martinez, Kathryn Joosten, Kevin M. Horton, Carey Van Dyke, Micky Dolenz
Written by: Naomi L. Selfman
Directed by: Mary Lambert
MPAA Rating: Not Rated
Running Time: 90
Date: 01/29/2011

Mega Python vs. Gatoroid (2011)

1/2 Star (out of 4)

Snakes and Divas

By Jeffrey M. Anderson

Though director Mary Lambert is a twenty-year veteran, having made the successful Pet Sematary (1989), among many other movies and TV shows, she comes across as a rank amateur on Syfy's TV movie Mega Python vs. Gatoroid. Almost every aspect of this thing is atrocious, beginning with the sloppy, visual effects to the jagged cutting and the lackadaisical logic. However, the main selling point, aside from the monsters, is the teaming of two 1980s pop music icons, Debbie Gibson and Tiffany (including a new song from each). Additionally, 1960s pop star Micky Dolenz briefly appears as himself.

In the Everglades, Chief Ranger Terry O'Hara (Tiffany) is charged with taking out a killer python after the death of her fiancé. She meets opposition from animal activist Dr. Nikki Riley (Debbie Gibson), and Terry responds with a new plan: she gives steroids to the gators so that they can take out the pythons. Unfortunately, this plan goes awry; all the snakes and gators grow to enormous size and begin snacking on nearby humans. Accompanied by an expert reptile hunter (A Martinez), the two women must team up to save the planet. Can they set aside their differences for this common goal?

It's refreshing to see two 40-something women as the lead characters in a movie, not to mention the fact that they are painted in strokes of gray: neither is the hero or the villain. But the actresses are forced through some absurd situations, from pie-fights to the sequence of the ranger feeding steroid-filled chickens to the alligators, mainly because of grief over her lost husband (huh?). The other monster movies in the Syfy series could possibly be viewed as "so-bad-they're-good" classics, but Mega Python vs. Gatoroid too often calls attention to its own badness, which prevents an audience from doing the same. Skip this creature feature.

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